Wot, no cheese???

I'm gonna cry!!! I am!! I am!!!! Ok, maybe not, may content meself with just banging me head on the kitchen table..... just blogged then it..well went really!! NO smilies either..hmmm... curiouser and curiouser....

Oooooo there they are!!

I have come to the conclusion that the universe does defintiely get bored.. oh yess.. and when it does it tweeks things.. nothing major, just a little shove, I reckon, to keep it amused for a while longer...... *Rubs shoulder and butt whilst sipping coffee...* I mean, It's only just gone 9 o clock and already....

I got up, threw open the curtains, opened the door and slipped on some chicken poo..... *WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSH* Feet in the air, butt in the poo....

wow what a way to go!! I can see the headline now..." Woman hospitalized by chicken poo....." I got up, quickly scouted about, no neighbours.. phew! Went inside, grabbed the bedroom door and..nothing...

pushed.. nope... banged and kicked ..nope... I couldn't get in.. so there I stood there, in me pjama bottoms decoratively covered in chicken poop and no way of gettiing to the shower, clean clothes or anyfink!! OK... a plan is needed....so I backed up and ran and threw meself at the door... and promptly bounced off.... kids woke up with all the noise and one by one we all took turns at trying to open the door, with a very inappropriate ammount of giggling going on behind hands, I have to say...

eventually I came to the conclusion that I'd have to drive the kids to school in me pjamas..... *sigh* which wouldn't be too much of a problem, bar the fact I was wearing the pjama bottoms with the dodgy elastic.... oh excellent, I get to moon the other parents too... *sob!!* I had to get into me bedroom!! So I marched round the house with a chair, whilst holding me bottoms up, and tried to get into the teeny little window open at the top.... head through, shoulders through and.... stuck by me female attributes.... NOooooo!! I then heard a muffled "Mornin Kate!" so I muffled back "Morning Stan"

Thanking the gods that I was hidden behind the garden fence, and he couldn't see me butt wiggling through the window....!! Managed to wiggle out and sat on more chicken poo.....

Right, next step... cry... nope, er.. phone Ol!!!

"ICAN'TGETINTHEBEDROOMORTHEWINDOWANDME
PJAMASAREFALLINGDOWN!!!"
Stunned silence followed by raucous laughter and not alot of advice... after a few mins he calmed down enough to say "Oh dear.. I'll look at it tonight"...TONIGHT????????? No way, no way I am driving to school like this, it had disaster written all over it!! So I pootled off to the garage and got out a screwdriver... and wonder of wonders, I managed to get the door handle off... which left me nothing to open the door with...and a handful of screws...*SOB* Clock ticking here.... right... so I grabbed the kids and we all put our weight onto the door whlst wiggling and jiggling it... and BAM!!!!!! Door flew open, kids took a step back and I didn't... fell into the bedroom and landed in a chicken poo covered heap on the floor.... But I was in!!!! Whooooop! Pelted into the bedroom, flung on some clothes and ran into the bathroom to brush me teeth... brushing away, quite chirpy, then I heard an almighty *CRASHHHHHHHHHHHH* As Daniel fell into to the room via the bedroom window...... oops... may have been wise to mentiont the fact I'd got in?.....

Actually, I've since come to the conclusion, that I may as well streak to school.... just got back and I've had my flies open the entire time.....